#'i'll have to create the concept of therapy to get around here'

[youkidding-me]

expanding on my previous post about orym witnessing cyrus's funeral

the silken squall burn their deceased over open bodies of water or forests, so their spirits can keep travelling after their bodies are gone

because of this, they have to move the city to the closest body of water/forest

the loved ones or volunteering magic users take turns watching over the body and keeping it cold. it's also a way for the deceased to not be left alone, assuring them their community is with them until the end

during the few days of travel, the immediate family will be showered with love, provided with food and having their house cleaned by their neighbours/friends/distant family. this is to give them time to mour and to prepare the cremation ceremony

dorian's house is the biggest tent in the city, made of probably a few dozen tents connected between each other and almost as tall as a two-story building

everyone lives in portable homes but it's colorful and organized. the tents have creative patterns either weaved, embroidered or painted on them. the stone roads make mosaics of air genasi motifs

the wyvernwind home is the only one covered with a huge linen roofing, though the normal colorful tent peaks underneath it

the entire wyvernwind is dressed in linen. not entirely, though, just their jewelry. dorian is always impeccably dressed, but his rings, earrings, boots, belt and shoulder piece has linen sewn around it. his father and mother are the same

dorian is almost always busy watching cyrus's body, recepting other air genasi that wish to bring food to the wyvernwinds, hand-making the wooden boat that will burn with cyrus in a few days

orym spends a lot of time with goyan enlil-wyvernwind, dorian's mom, since zeru wyvernwind seems to have assumed most of the work on land

(orym suspects the man is avoiding his grieving home's emotional needs like the plague)

they talk a lot about dorian - his childhood, his adventures outside that city, his music, his fight - but she also seems interested about orym

more than once orym thinks if she actually wants to know about his life with the air ashari and how much it's her common diplomatic gait

"the linen?" she answers orym. it took him three days to build courage to ask. "have you noticed how our skin looks against the sky?"

goyan was the slightest darker than dorian, though her hair was a lighter blue. the resemblance to her son was undeniable, even if her eyes were green like cyrus's

"you look like the sky on a clear day"

"every day is clear up here" she said with a smile. "under all this linen, against the blue, what do we look like?"

"clouds" orym answered, and she nodded. "we look like clouds. it's an old tradition that says that, if we cover our loved one in linen, we'll not be saying goodbye to a loved one, but to a cloud passing by."

she managed to say the entire thing with posture, but drops everything she's holding and covers her mouth, breathing hard. "oh no, my baby! my baby, my baby, my baby..."

and orym comforts her, knowing too well what she's feeling

orym can't help to watch cyrus, but he's everywhere else: his hands bleed after cutting all the wood for the boat, he seems to be the only reason dorian remembers to eat and drink water, and he loses his sleep to hold his insomniac lover

"i'm such a fucking failure. i suck, i suck so much. i can't do this, orym, i can't fucking do this" dorian growls against his chest

"i'm right here, my love. we'll do this together. you're doing incredibly, i'm so proud of you."

"it should be him in my place. i was never meant to be here, this not my place"

orym swallows the vision of unconscious dorian in his arms under the radiant gaze of predathos. he wants to smack dorian for saying nonsense, but he knows that pain too well. "not a lot of people can say they were so loved until the very end. in times of chaos, you are giving cyrus the treatment of a prince."

"i barely feel like myself most of the time. i can't remember the days."

and orym holds him, because he knows how it feels

zeru comes back the morning of the ceremony, the sixth day of orym's stay. his skin is ashy and his light blue eyes have sunk into his skull

goyan is keeping him company, touching his arm, his face, his back - and he leans into the touch every time with fail

they have a family meal and zeru avoids dorian's gaze at all costs. orym doesn't know if dorian noticed, because his gaze is equally focused on the table

by the end of the day, the city is reunited, with the wyvernwinds ahead, by the edge of the silken squall. beneath them, the ocean glistens dark blue and purple

cyrus's boat is perfectly tailored for his size, filled with a few of his belongings and his body fully protected by linen. before sending it away, an old genasi lady cuts off the linen on the wyvernwinds clothes and puts the fabric in the boat as well

cyrus floats away, though always closest to dorian than anyone else in the world

dorian whistles a tune as a guard raises a flaming arrow, that flies when the tune ends

fire silently burns the boat into dust as the dozens of genasi watched in complete silence. the only heir of the silken squall holds himself up, though his fingers squeeze orym's painfully

the first time dorian and zeru look at each other is when the last pieces of brumestone fall and there's nothing else to watch. father and son look nothing alike, orym notices - zeru's angular jaw and broad built is an almost ghostly replica of cyrus. dorian's dimples and loose waves resemble his mother a lot more

they don't say a word. dorian's tears are loud and choked, cutting the night air like a knife to the gut. zeru's tears are ragged and tired, ringing with his deep voice, like the land cried with him

goyan hold both of them, closing themselves from the rest of the world

orym decides to leave with the other genasi citizens back to his quarters. as much as he promised he'd be there for him, this was the time for the wyvernwinds. when dorian needs him, he'll be right there to help and support him, like dorian is for him

the night fell, but the sun will always rise in the end

[ju-vondy]

Jason's past info reveal on EP. Five X My own thoughts...

After playing the latest episode of MCL New Gen I had to do this post because when Jason told us about his father I almost fell of my chair screaming "OMG I WAS RIGHT???!!!!!" For those who didn't play the episode 5 yet: ���⚠️spoilers 🚨⚠️

So... I had this feeling that Beemoov was going to introduce a family drama for Jason, particularly involving his father, to justify his poor behavior, ya know? Like...: the typical story where the teenager loses his father, faces family problems and ends up becoming bitter and tough because of it. The whole "family is a mess" narrative LOL (I honestly hate that concept of "You can heal she/he" thing that usually come together with this kinda plot, that's why even though I made a difficult past for Jason in my fic, he secretly goes into therapy often... so Candy won't need to worry about being a damn "healer" for him 😂)

In fact, I even considered killing his father when Jason was a teenager in my fanfic because I was so sure his dad was dead. But then I thought, "No... Beemoov wouldn't use that cliché of the man who lost his father too soon and had to take on family responsibilities at 18, right? What a drama!"

So, today I'm here to justify the plot I thought about to you: I didn't kill off Jason's father in my fanfic because in my mind it would be too obvious and cliché. Instead, I wanted to explore a different angle that still included family issues and could add depth into Jason's character. But then... I realized that my own story also ended up being quite dramatic LMAO 🤣😅🤐

The way I created Jason's family tragedy, I know it got intense, and sometimes I feel like such a villain for it (~crying in author language~). For a kid, it must be very though waking up from an accident and listening "So... Your father is in a coma. We don't know if he'll wake up or no. He can live but he can also die suddenly, be prepared." And then you wake up everyday hoping your father will wake up but he didn't and you get nothing instead of a fake hope that the next day will be different... You are unsure if he's going to live or die. You didn't lost the person, but you lost its presence, voice, bad jokes, caring, etc. However, you still don't want to lose hope. So, for Jason kid it was like "I'll do my best everyday so when papa wakes up he'll be proud of me :D"

I decided to put Jason's father (I named him as Gregory) through a coma when Jason was a kid for two main reasons: 1) Give Jason a motivation and 2) don't make him deal with "taking care family matters out of the blue" once he was too young.

> That leads to his uncle (named Viktor) accompanying Jason's growth and teaching him everything about the family business, being a leader and etc. Of course Viktor had an aggressive method once Jason father's part of the family is crap and cruel (as I shared on this post).

Despite growing up with his uncle filling his head with nonsense about love being a weakness and such things, young Jason didn't want to be bitter and iced-heart like that. (Yep, he was a hectic kid but that doesn't mean he was evil, he just liked to have fun messing around.) He remembered his father being kind and gentle, almost as if he wanted to break the tough mold of the family. But later Jason faced many disappointments because, being from a wealthy family, (BTW, I got kinda sad when Jason said they were not rich in the EP 5, but now that's done and I don't regret describing his family the way I did once we didn't have any information hehehe) many people around them were fake. He also suffered bullying for being skinny, so... All of those bad things led him to think around the age of 16-17: "Well, there's no other way. When I'm not at home I'll have to put on this mask that my uncle taught me so others won't walk all over me."

However, internally Jason still held hope that Gregory would wake up someday and... Within his good heart, there was the desire of wanting to make his dad proud ~if he woke up~ Jason had as a kid > it still remained there in his mind, so he gave his best effort in everything they put he to do back that time. But at a certain point there was so much pressure on the poor boy that he ended up having a breakdown. 'Do this' 'Don't do that' 'Be perfect' 'Get good grades' 'Blah blah blah'... At the age of 18-19 Jason found himself having like those "I'VE HAD ENOUGH!" moments of life LOL 🤣 He never really liked everything the Mendal stood for, anyway. He always found it a drag to attend luxury dinners, close deals and pretend to be someone he wasn't… Jason ended up becoming a rebellious young-adult despite being studious and dedicated to his goals.

And then things got worse when Jason was near his 20-21 years old: his father sadly woke up in a minimally conscious state. (So: today his father is not dead, but he's not "living" as well. You know? When someone is awake but can't talk, move, etc. sometimes the person can exhibit limited and inconsistent responses to external stimuli, but that's all.) I think that was the "breaking point". Jason got deeply disappointed: He felt like everything he had done in his entire life was for nothing. As a result, the dark-haired began to exhibit dysfunctional behavior, skipping work at the family company, arriving late etc, etc. Viktor took advantage of this moment of weakness and convinced the board/the general council that Jason became irresponsible, went off the rail and therefore was unfit for any leadership position and would never be good enough to take the vice president or president's company role. That made our hated beloved protagonist really angry, it felt like a big betrayal for him. Following that, in a fit of impulsivity, Jason had those moments of "'Fuck you guys. I don't need you idiots. My family sucks and I'll prove them that I can make it on my own without using my father's name.' And that's why he resigned from his position and began working on something else, which would later culminate in the founding of Goldreamz. (Fortunately, this was the moment he decided to start seeing a therapist again, for our sake's.)

Well... I gave you too many spoilers of the fic already, so, basically: Jason’s past sucks and his journey in my point of view is intertwined with themes of redemption, ambition, growing and a desire to protect those he cares about besides his own heart ~which he chooses to not open up with random people. He's not an asshole/jerk, but he decides consciously to behave as if he is one because a bunch of internal reasons. (His therapist is still trying to work on that btw 👀) Jason only shows his truly self when he with his mom, brother, close friends and some of his mother's relatives. (And hopefully, near Candy... As time goes by and they fall for each other) Selective behavior, ya know? It is common for people undergoing therapy to selectively share their true feelings and thoughts with a trusted inner circle, while emotionally protecting themselves from others. Besides, we must remember that therapy is a long and sometimes non-linear process: Jason may resist complete changes, preferring to maintain a protective behavior while slowly working on his internal issues. Jason does not intend to change it, actually. He's happy with only the people he cares about knowing who he truly is... He's like: "bitch, I don't care" about the others. 😅😆

With all of that said: I can’t wait to delve deeper into Jason's motivations in my upcoming chapters, exploring the intricate web of personal and professional stakes that drive Jason’s actions. 🤭 Stay tuned for more revelations and twists 🤪

If you’ve been following my fanfic, let me know your thoughts on Jason’s development and how you think his backstory ties into the larger narrative. And if you’re just catching up on the game itself (MCL New Gen), what do you think of the latest episode? Let’s discuss!

If you're not following my fanfic, I recommend you read this post first 😅 Thank you all for supporting my work and crazy ideas 💖

[pure-garbage]

Not-So-Quick Thought Dump

I'm currently working on a handful of chapters that are actually incredibly important to me. I've been a victim of domestic abuse in the past, so it's an unbelievably difficult topic for me to write about. As much as writing can provide therapy and catharsis, I'm still only human and I get triggered sometimes trying to work through trauma I've personally experienced. I'm sure I'll end up hiding all the pain under a few layers of comedy, which is also fine. That's valid as an art form(I think).

That being said, I'm very pleased with the way I present the situation playing out roughly through chapters 123, likely to around 127. Character aspects like the ones explored here are a huge part of the reason I love the straw hat women so much, especially Robin(Lots of love for Nami too, but she is significantly younger and I head canon her as less experienced/wise).

Robin is the friend I always wanted but never had when I was dealing with my own struggles. She's centered, she's grounding, she's practical, and she can be amazingly fierce when it come to protecting/advocating for the people she cares about.

Going through my own experiences, I never had anyone who told me what I was going through was not okay. It can be incredibly confusing to be victimized by someone you have strong feelings for, whether that's romantic or familial. One of the hardest things in the world to realize is that two things can be true simultaneously: you can love someone and still not be okay with the way they treat you. You can create boundaries, have tough discussions and try to change behaviors. If change isn't possible, it becomes necessary to walk away, which is a separate challenge in and of itself.

Also the concept that someone can hurt you without meaning to and that's still not acceptable. It's easy to make excuses for the people who hurt us instead of holding them to account. Justifying the actions of someone you love is a hell of a lot easier than communicating with them. It's a lot easier than telling them you aren't okay with what they did. It's a lot easier than asking them not to do it again. Especially if they don't realize or don't want to admit that they hurt you. Maybe they were just playing. Maybe they thought you could handle it. If you're tempted to make excuses for them, you'd better believe that if you try to have a conversation about what happened, they'll likely make excuses for themselves.

This point cuts extra deep, at least for me, because it goes both ways. We can hurt the people around us without that being our intention. Hurting someone doesn't automatically make you the bad guy. Every fight in a relationship doesn't necessarily have a 'right' or 'wrong' side. It's fine to have a little self-forgiveness, but it has to be paired with caution. Don't make excuses for yourself instead of taking responsibility. The only thing you can really do to wrong another person is violate the boundaries they set knowing that you're doing so.

Whatever happened, even if it was a little thing, a petty thing, a 'stupid' thing: if you didn't like it, that's enough reason for it to never happen again. That's called setting a boundary and anyone who cares about you will respect the lines you draw in the sand and go out of their way not to cross those lines again. Which probably sounds super basic, like it should 'go without saying', but some of us were raised in dysfunctional households. For us, this really basic knowledge is a completely alien concept that we learn about later on. It's a life-changing epiphany if you're lucky enough to realize it consciously.

So if there's one lesson I can impart with this little arc, I hope that it is this: love and respect go hand in hand and they have to be mutual. Put the work in, be considerate, but don't forget to demand the same effort and consideration in return.

And walking away from a bad situation never makes you a bad person.

[canonisdead]

I'm bored so I'll info dump about my first MLP OC

This character has changed much over the years that the one fanart I requested doesnt fit anymore.

She didn't have a name nor gender identify when she 'basically crash landed at the edge of the Ever Free Forest. (I don't remember how to spell that) Because she was never created as an individual. The cult she fled from used her as a killing machine.

(I'm sorry this one of those OCs that is close with a main character so bear with me-)

Fluttershy just assumed she was a female and this creature just was like 'This is my identity now'.

They had a communication barrier due to how she could not understand English at this point.

Her name is Starry because that's the only word she would answer to. 'Alright guess this is my name now, never had a name before'.

Starry is fairly easy to be around because she doesn't exactly look like a pony. She has lynx like tuffs on the top of her ears and thick fur around the bottom of her hooves.

She is one of my many races of Inners. They're called inners because they all have inner chaotic magic energy in their bodies.

She's an Earthinner. Flowers will merge with their body if they come into close contact with them. They also have vines inside their fur that they can use to pick things up. Sometimes animals stick to them like growing moss. They usually are shy and stay far away in forests.

She has lived for a long time but still is younger than Discord and the royal sisters.

Sexuality? Starry doesn't understand the concept of sexuality. "Why do you creatures need all these words? Can't you just like everyone? Is this one of those weird pony things?"

She has seen Inners and animals mate so she also doesn't know of the idea of others having intercourse for fun and not reproduction.

Starry is like a gray area, she isn't good or evil.

Thank god for pony town because pony appearance descriptions are hard for me

Starry has no cutie mark because she was created with just magic, she has no relatives. Inners usually are just born with their marks.

Her appearance sadly isn't too accurate because she's supposed to have scars on her body from all the fighting she did in the Cult. And uh she's supposed to have a pink flowered merged to her mane by her ear but I can't draw ponies so oh well.

Starry is not a very nice little creature, except to Fluttershy. She dislikes majority of ponies. Snarky and is usually not afraid to tell you what is on her mind.

She really likes apples and its hard to get her to try other foods.

She dislikes ponies and other species like looking at her scars, because of a 5+ years grudge she's been holding against Rarity. (its probably just me but I just see Rarity as the type to offer you advice to cover up scars, not purposely being mean I don't think. And it proceeded to affect Starry's psyche for years but Starry denies such a thing) Avoids mirrors like the plague because the second she looks in one, she will feel some sort of ugly body dysphoria.

Starry doesn't exactly have a favorite animal, she just prefers animals that are colored black or have been mistreated by either birth parents or someone else.

She very rarely takes any steps into town, to avoid contact with the residents. Only if she feels like she has to go into town.

She is probably unhealthy attached to the cottage, she likes it just as clean as it was when she first was slowly treated here.

Her prefered hobby is drawing, sometimes normal drawings and other times rant drawings. "What can therapy do for me that drawing in a rage doesn't?"

The horn isn't really a unicorn horn though it does look like it. She can't use levitation with it or use spells. Only chaotic magic is in it and she only uses the magic for magically fixing broken things, help dying plants and instantly fixing any broken bones stray animals have. She uses her vines to pick things up and rarely uses her hooves to pick things up.

She was genetically created to be too fast for the naked eye. But flying is a mess, she can't control her direction. And also it makes her sick. So she doesn't like using her wings for flying. She finds them more useful for shielding small critters.

She prefers running, she can control that. And why fly in the sky when you can walk on the earth and appreciate the sights.

Me putting mental problems on an OC no one even cares about anymore. She has depression and needs therapy but denies such a problem existing. She's like a cat, hates people and is prideful.

Starry has lots of nightmares but her worst fear is waking up to see Discord disorganizing the whole cottage.

Starry: *Waking up on the couch in a cold sweat while making distressed meowing* ...Thank god the cottage is still the same.

Starry is never present for any dangerous situations in Equestria because she's dealing with a squirrel divorce case. It started with two squirrels fighting over an acorn. Then they decided to get married. Then days later they wanted couple counseling.

Which ended in a divorce case. And Starry is losing her mind but she doesn't dare bring Fluttershy into this nonsense.

She hates the mistreatment of trees, her Earthinner powers are connected to the plant life in Ponyville (only Ponyville) so every time a tree is bucked, it's like a headache to her.

Curled on the floor of the cottage with her hooves to her ears. "Can't they just ask the trees to drop the apples? Does no one care about how the trees feel?!"

[pompadourpink]

bonjour mom this might be a stupid question but i'm super interested in environmental protection and i'm trying to go vegan and buy less and all that jazz but everything is super expensive if it's local or it's okay but they have to fly it here etc and i understand your idea of only getting quality stuff but like i don't know yet what i like so i don't want to splurge (not that i could anyway) and i want to avoid amazon but it's super practical and at least it's for sure not a scam and i WILL get my package etc, and sometimes i do like a bit of dairy or i'll have birthday cake but i feel super guilty about it and i'm getting super anxious, do you have any advice??

Hello dear (and oh boy, this is going to be another wall of text),

I've been there. I went vegetarian with the hopes of becoming vegan back in 2012, went super minimalist, started to buy way less, switched to bulk and organic, got a menstrual cup, felt like I had to donate money I didn't have because others needed it more than me and felt awful every time I binned something thinking I actually didn't need that thing and that was a selfish decision, and it was so hard to see other people around me not caring about these things. It was eating me alive and making me bitter and sadder than a bag of rocks. It's a real thing called eco-anxiety and it's well-documented at this point so you can look it up.

In my case, researching capitalism and going to therapy were the key. Because little old me being vegan not only wasn't sustainable because I had personal issues with food and ADHD and it made it worse, but at the end of the day it's not going to be enough to annihilate centuries of specism and make the industry change its mind; just like little old me feeling guilty about buying ice cream because I was going to have to throw away the pot is the most insignificant thing in the world when you look at what Nestlé or cruise boats are doing to the planet.

Whatever you do, you will have to sacrifice something and it will never be enough - you've already noticed it. Change comes gradually, when people come together and stand against what's wrong, which has been harder to do these days where we routinely lose family members and friends to Facebook radicalisation. My advice is to do what I've been doing, after years of trial and error: putting myself first, staying realistic about my goals, practising empathy, remembering to be a role model rather than a preacher, and giving myself time before I make a decision.

I like you prefer to boycott Amazon but between shipping fees, delivery time, dodgy neighbours, prices, fear of scammers (...), I used it occasionally to get stuff whenever it felt like the best solution. But then, at the beginning of the pandemic, I bought face masks online from a French pharmacy, which cost quite a lot but I was trying to do the good thing. Three weeks later I received a white piece of plastic that looked like every package from Wish videos on Youtube from somewhere in China that contained the masks with a little note in broken English stating that those were only for fashion and couldn't be worn for medical reasons.

I did some research and realised that they bought the items for pennies on Aliexpress and got the suppliers to directly send me my order - it's a very scammy and common concept called drop shipping. If you're looking for anything brandless on Amazon (from sunglasses to hairbrushes to decoration and gym equipment), check out Aliexpress and your cart will go from 132,99 to 17 bucks in under five minutes. So after years of judging people who use Aliexpress or Wish, I started doing the same, because what I receive is the exact same thing, but there's no mediocre business tycoon wannabee making a profit on my behalf in between.

And ever since, I've rethought my beliefs. I no longer feel bad about wanting children even though every human being creates a lot of waste in a world where Kylie Jenner takes a private jet to avoid a 40-minute drive. I no longer feel bad about occasionally flying to go on vacation because I have only one shot at living and once in a while I deserve a break. I no longer feel bad about doing my nails even though I will have to buy and dispose of cotton buds because I'm tired of neglecting my happiness to avoid worsening problems I haven't even caused.

I still do what I can. I'm still conscious of what I do, don't waste water, buy all my clothes secondhand, donate money whenever I can and all that, but I'm at peace. I try and that's what matters in a world where succeeding is not an option.

Love,

Mum

[angelsaxis]

Even though I very rarely talk about them on here, I really should explain more about Richard, Valentine, and Zinnia. I think part of the reason I do less of this is because it's a contemporary adult romance setting and lots of people who follow me by now know that I do fantasy more (hence TYC).

Richard is a gay concept artist and/or character designer living in New York, Zinnia as well. They're best friends and they met through work, and Richard is the more chaotic act first/think second of the two. Always on the move, he's working two jobs because the viddy game one isn't sustaining him (he also works at best buy as a truck loader).

Richard has a roommate that's barely in the apartment and when he is he kinda ghosts around. Then he disappears one day and he doesn't come back and rent is due and then it's due again and Richard is like. Pissed off esp since the guys alive he's just not responsible. Zinnia lives with her cousin in another apartment a few blocks away.

Val at this point is houseless and living on the street. Val and Richard meet through a mutual aid app where basically someone with means (whatever that may mean for Richard) helps out someone without any means.

Several pieces fall into place. Richards roommate leaves and now he's responsible for all his rent. An hourly job as a member of geek squad opens up at best buy and Richards annoying manager is a sucker for anything military. And global warming has created harsh winter blizzards and one is coming.

What do you know Valentine's a vet who majored in compsci and knows about computers and also needs an apartment to stay in and a job.

So Richard hounds his manager to hire Valentine and he gets the job. Now he's off the street, has a roof over his head even if it's a kinda shitty NY apartment. But also he's clearly a v quiet and reserved guy (terribly shy around new people).

But as the weather warms up they get warmer w each other and then they're pretty decent friends. Val gets poached by a guy at best buy and now he's got a much better paying salaried job. He's also started to develop feelings for Richard but he still thinks he's straight.

Richard has a dog that they both do initial bonding over. Her name is Clancy. Val has nightmares that Clancy wakes him up from.

Val and Zinnia also become closer friends cause they both have the same sense of humor and zinnia is genuinely just a nice person. She's the one to convince Val to get therapy since you know, he's got health insurance now so he might as well use it.

I'll probably continue in a reblog bc I forgot u can't do readmores on mobile

[liibrii]

In honour of today being National Culture Day in my country and exactly a year since I've seen my favourite band perform live, I've decided to take a minute and talk about Dream Theater. And by talk I mean mostly nerd out about my favourite songs and why I love them so much.

in case you haven’t heard of Dream Theater before, they’re an american progressive metal band, who’s been around since 1985. idk what else to say except even if you don’t like metal/rock give a listen to Beneath the surface.

tw: some pretty heavy topics such as death, murder, mental illness, alcoholism,... 

so to start, I love the versatility of their songs and yet they still have that distinct Dream Theater sound. my favourite part of their music are the lyrics. a lot of them are inspired by their own personal experience, which often makes them just the more heart breaking. and for others, I don't know what creator juice these guys are on but I'd like some. they’re the kind of lyrics you want to read while listening to the music just to really get the meaning, and you spend days thinking about them. or maybe that’s just me. :D 

also Petrucci's guitar skills are outta this world, which sadly often overshadows others who are also incredible musicians. I have a soft spot the singer LaBrie cause 1. his voice and singing are magnificent, and 2. he damaged his voice pretty badly but perservered even when critics weren’t very nice to his singing and I respect that.

I'll start with my favourite album (and the one I heard live) - Metropolis Pt. 2: scenes from a Memory. it's a concept album, which if you don't know is an album that has a single central narrative (can be lyrics, musical theme,...). in this case it tells a story of Nicholas, a man who keeps having dreams about a girl named Victoria, and how through hypnotic therapy he discovered he was her in the previous life. Victoria was murdered and her death never solved, so we follow him as he discovers the truth behind her death. I won't spoil it, in case you're curious but don't wanna read the lyrics you can find a synopsis here. I'll just say the story of this album is better than majority of movies.

If you put a gun to my head and made me choose my favourite song on this album it would be the very last one: Finally Free. it's charged with so much emotion, the way LaBrie sings the lyrics; you can tell which part belongs to which character, it's just soooo good! The way each repeats the lines This feeling / Inside me / I finally found my love (life) / I've finally broke free - and I'd go on but I'd get into spoiler territory. so. let's move on with the closing melody (it's not much of a melody, more like static) that becomes the opening of the first song on their next album Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence.

Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence is another concept album. this album. man, how do I even begin to explain it? I can't, you gotta listen to it. have you ever imagined an entire album telling stories of people living with things like alcoholism, post-partum depression, autism, schizophrenia? it may sound intimidating and I won't lie, some songs touch you so deeply it's hard to listen to them (looking at you Goodnight kiss).

and now that my fave albums are outta the way let's talk about my favourite songs in no particular order! (just a note, pretty much everything I’ll say about the lyrics is my personal interpretation)

Beneath the Surface (album: A dramatic turn of Events) - the one that makes me cry like a baby. the one I tefuse to shut up about. the story of two people who are in love, neither aware the other feels the same,  both too scared to make a move till it’s to late and their feelings fade. just, listen to it, please. it’s also the least ‘metal’ of their songs, if that’s not the kind of music you’re fond of.

Spirit carries on (album: Metropolis Pt. 2: Scenes from a memory): I can’t say much about it without spoiling the story of the album, so let’s say it was experience of a lifetime singing this song on the concert, off key and out of tune, with your bestfriends beside you, all of you crying. 10/10 experience.

Through her eyes (album: Metropolis Pt. 2: Scenes from a memory) - same as Spirit carries on :D

Finally free (album: Metropolis Pt. 2: Scenes from a memory) - the emotion!! I want to sing this song at the top of my lungs while it makes tears pour down my face. it’s such a good final song to this absolutely brilliant album.

Pull me Under (album: Images and Words) - when that LaBrie voice hits... if you’ve ever heard this song you know what I mean, and if you are yet too, you’ll know which part I mean. you’ll hear it, trust me. (it’s at 2:54)

Vacant (album: Train of thought): ah look, another song that makes me cry. LaBrie wrote this after his daughter fell into coma for 3 hours when she was 7, and let me tell you, you can feel the fear. easily one of their most heart breaking songs. but she’s okay now, don’t worry. :)

Stream of Consciousness (album: Train of Thought) - an instrumental song with guys just flexing their skills. 

Wither (album: Black Clouds & Silver Linings) - the story behind this song is Petrucci had trouble coming up with new lyrics so this mad-lad pulled a UNO reverse card and wrote a song on having trouble creating. and as a writer who often hits writer’s block I relate to that. 

Count of Tuscany (album: Black Clouds & Silver Linings) - the story of this song could easily be a movie. you meet a young count on your travels and he takes you to his home where his slightly eccentric brother lives, and before you know you’re terrified for your life. I have yet to hear a song that captures the fear of dying as well as this one. 20 minutes of pure bliss and singing at the top of your lungs. 

Out of Reach (album: Distance over Time) - you know that feeling of falling for someone who’s out of reach? yeah, that. 

Fall into the light (album: Distance over Time) - the line Too much love is not enough for us makes me question what is really important in life and I love it when songs make me think. it’s such a simple line and yet so powerful. (spare some of the creator juice?)

Ministry of Lost Souls (album: Systematic Chaos) - you thought we were done with songs that make me cry? ha, think again! this is the song that sold me on Dream Theater. the lyrics have 2 different interpretations, both of which are heart breaking and thus I won’t talk about them. :) 

Prophets of War (album: Systematic Chaos) - I’m not saying it’s about the possible ulterior motives of the Iraq war buuuut... oh no, wait that’s exactly what the song is about. 

Endless sacrifice (album: Train of Thought) - just a song about how relationships take work and compromising, especially when one is a musician and often on tours. Petrucci wrote this song for his wife. get you a man who recognises how much you’ve sacrificed to make the relationship work. 

Build me up, break me down (album: A dramatic turn of events) - I have no other reason for liking this song other than it is an absolute banger.

Panic Attack (album: Octavarium) - this song includes my favourite singing from LaBrie. goosebumps every time. and also the suffocating feeling of pure panic, the paralysis you feel are so well reflected in the music it’s unreal. 

Octavarium (album: Octavarium) - this song has my fave line: It's wonderful to know that I could be / Something more than what I dreamed. and it also takes the award of “Lyrics whose meaning I’ve been trying to figure out for years and still have no clue“. and the orchestral parts of this song... I hope to get a chance to hear it live one day.

I was debating putting some of my favourite lyrics here but I think this post is already long enough. :)

in conclusion, I love Dream Theater and I hope they keep making music!! ♡